Friday, October 13, 2006

8.4 kg and 66.5cm

The latest update for Charlize who just got back from the doctor for her 6 month immunization -- taller and only a little heavier.

She speaks with the innocence and lack of knowledge of a child. I halfway want to dismiss what she says but I know there is wisdom within naievete and strength too.
"She's angry at you because you are being bad". Deep down all my years in school, searching for knowledge, for answers always searching outwards but finding that real knowledge comes from trusting, searching and rediscovering the innocent wisdom of childhood.

Yes, I think she does miss me and it makes me feel sad and helpless that she only has that shell of a man, that untrue Canadian with a bad heart and a bad brain to reach out to.

I cannot sleep at night. I have no peace. I just wait until I can protect her with my brusqueness, I wait to push her, she will tire of my pushing in a few years but it will give her the right start. She longs to stand and bounce and run and play.

Her mother treats her like a delicate crystal.

She's not. She's a great gnarled oak.

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